Thank you, Mama T

People think I go to bring Christ to the poor. They do not understand that it is in the poor that I meet Christ.

Mother Teresa

Street cred

Andy attempted to grow some "street cred" for about a week and I must say, he looked like a burly mountain man. Thick, red, bushy streed cred. He figured he should start looking the part for our adventures on the road and it gave him an excuse not to shave. I actually thought it looked good on him however, kissing was fairly abrasive and I kind of flinched every time. So after my 4 days of complaining he finally gave in and plowed it down. Thanks babe!
This got me thinking about our journey that we are about to take.
Jen and I went downtown today to check out and meet some groups who are really reaching out to the homeless community. We visited Shepherd's Door (a Christ-centered women's facility/treatment center) and Sisters of the Road Cafe. We didn't actually get a chance to go inside Shepherd's Door but we talked with Maxine and we will be scheduling a time to tour the place and talk with some of the people there. Sisters of the Road cafe is amazing! They provide meals Mon-Fri for really cheap and offer bartering/work for food kind of deals. It is not faith-based but it totally meets the people at the ground level and offers A LOT of help, plus they just wrote a book that reveals many stories straight from the mouths of street folk.
Annnyways....as we walked around the streets of Portland talking with people and hanging out at Sister of the Road the reality sunk in a little bit more. The reality that this is not my reality. I have been living in suburbia for all my life and unless I was to dive into the street life, I will never fully understand. It is a raw, rough, mean and hard life out there, some areas worse than others. I am not raw, rough, mean or hard. I am rich, nice, pampered, and soft. Nothing about me comes from a life on the streets. I can go downtown everyday to serve, hang out, and love on people but I still have a safe, warm, beautiful home to come back to. I don't have to think about how to survive. And I have NO "street cred". I could grow my leg and armpit hair out or rat my hair into dreadlocks but the fact still remains that I am a suburban girl.
No, I'm not backing out of this whole RV adventure or anything like that, I am just being humbled a little bit more. I am seeing that our purpose on the road is to learn and soak it up like a dry sponge. To learn what it means to rely on Him, what it means to love, how to listen, how to live in community, and meeting new people all around the nation. I feel so blessed to actually have this amazing opportunity to do just this, but it also scares me to know that there are many more humbling moments. To know that there is truly nothing that I have to offer except Jesus who lives in my heart is hard to except but also incredibly freeing. I can be confident all through my life that no matter where God takes me I have something eternal to offer the people I meet. The only "street cred" I have is Jesus' reflection in me. He is everything to everyone; may I be a useful vessel for Him.

I'm starting to understand

It has taken me a while to process things from last week. A LOT happened. We got back from a week of luxury and fun in Hawaii and the day after we got back, we put on a feast for the homeless. Andy then went back to teaching and wrestling, we celebrated Avery-man's #5 birthday (yay!) and here we are. Whew!
So, I wanted to share my thoughts on the banquet ( you can look at the pictures to the right of this post). It's one of those moments you can't really put into words but I'll try.
We were able to invite 32 men and women from off the street of Portland and from the rest stop in Wilsonville to a friends' house in Aurora. She and her husband had felt the Lord nudging them to open their house for this banquet (and may they be richly blessed for it!).
We had about 30 volunteers from all different places, even some who I had never met, come to serve. It was a beautiful gathering of people who love God and want to serve Him. My emotions were on my sleeve that day as I just saw the Holy Spirit moving powerfully amongst His followers in that house. The hands and feet of Jesus, plain as day.
There was much preparing before our guests arrived but also much laughing, crying, and fellowshipping as we anticipated the climax of this event. The joy of the Lord was very present and there was no strife as we did His work.
The first group of guests came from the rest stop right in Wilsonville. Curt, Delores, and Toby were just a few of those that I was able to sit and talk with. So many stories......
They were able to sit, eat, and relax comfortably as we waited for the next group from Portland to arrive. A couple of them were able to start showers and nestle in to a good, comfy spot on the couch to watch football.
Its easy to get to know these people. They are ready to talk and more open and honest than the average American. In most cases, they have gone through some very hard times, have lived in some very rough conditions, and have experienced some seriously humiliating and painful moments. A lot of them live with shame, guilt, loneliness, sadness, addictions, and heartache from rejection after rejection. They have experienced the bottom of the pit, so to share their heart is no big deal to most of them. So when someone sits next to them and gives them a smile and an ear, they gush. It might be a little messy, stinky, and actually it might not make any sense at all, but the fact that they got to release a little of that to a safe place is healing for them, and for me. It always comes back to the fact that Jesus lives in me and is loving these people through me, so if I can take a step back and relax about the dirt, He can work.
Jesus continues to refine me in these moments, showing me that He loves me equally as much as He loves those who live on the streets.
After everyone filled their tummies with ham, chicken soup, meatballs, rolls, potato salad, dessert, coffee, etc., they had an opportunity to shower, get a haircut, go down to the garage (which was nicely organized with new clothing, backpacks, supplies, sleeping bags, jackets, hats, gloves, etc.) to pick out whatever they wanted, and to relax on the couch. They were all taken back to the streets at 5:00pm with clean bodies, full tummies, new supplies, and most importantly more Hope in their hearts. I have no idea what they are all doing at this moment or how much they were impacted, all I know is that I did what Jesus called us to do. I feel more full of Him and I'm starting to understand more. He laid it out pretty simply to us in the New Testament, but we've made it way too complex. When we start walking in the simple, yet narrow, path He clears our vision and gives us more purpose than we could ever imagine. We are all chosen by God, but which path are we choosing? To understand you are chosen you must first choose the path. It is a path of faith. So the next time you get a crazy thought in your head to buy a jug of milk for some random person, do it, He'll show up. Life with Jesus is exciting and full. Come, He is beckoning His church out of the boat.

hope for the hopeless

Sunday was our second time bringing a group of people down to serve some of the homeless community under the Burnside Bridge. We brought hot chili, rolls, lots of warm clothing, blankets, sleeping bags, fruit, Clif bars, water bottles, hot cocoa, hand warmers and a football game to watch on t.v. with chairs to lounge in. It was another awesome experience! The Lord came with us and let loose His amazing covering of Peace and Joy for a few hours to those who wanted it.
It always takes me a few days to process the things He shows me. I hold it in my heart until it hurts too bad and Jesus then asks me to release it to His heart so that He can work.
I met a man who said something to me that hit my heart like a brick. I was standing near the oranges and apples when a guy comes up that I hadn't seen before. I looked at him and cheerfully welcomed him. I then asked him how he was doing. He answered with the saddest eyes, "Well, I woke up today." Completely serious and completely hopeless. I was without words at that moment. I just looked at him, as a deer does, staring at the bright, scary headlights that might soon plow it over if it doesn't turn away quickly and get the hell out of there.
The darkness that I saw in this man's eyes was piercing. I wanted to run away from it because I knew I couldn't do anything about it. All of my intellect, resources, hot chili, and niceness could not even come close to stomping on the power of darkness that had invaded his soul. He had lost all hope.
Once again, I am reminded Who lives in my heart. He is waiting for me to set Him free so that He can shine His LIGHT on the darkness. He is waiting for His Church to set Him free.
So, where is Jesus? Why do we see sadness, poverty, hopelessness, abuse, and starving children everywhere? He is in the hearts of His believers. But the Church has hid the Light under the bushel and kept it to itself.
Yep, the Truth hurts sometimes, but we need to hear it.
Some 2000 or so years ago when God sent His Son to die for our sins and leave His Spirit to those who believe, He did it so that we would join Him in setting the captives free and enjoy an amazing relationship with Him.
If only we knew the Power we had living inside of us.
When I see folks who have lost hope, the enemy tries to say to me, "You can't do anything to help this person. You might as well go on to the next person."
Yes, he is right. I cannot do anything. But if we hold the Truth in our hearts, we can deflect that with, "Jesus, help them. Use me as your hands and feet to give them hope for Life."
Lord, Jesus, stir up a passion in your Body. Give us courage to step out of the boat so that our faith in You will become strong. Keep us focused so that we might give every person that you set before us a concentrated dose of your Love. You are waiting and ready. Come, Jesus, come.

This little light of mine,
I'm gonna let it shine
This little light of mine,
I'm gonna let it shine
This little light of mine,
I'm gonna let it shine
Let it shine,
Let it shine,
Let it shine.

Hide it under a bushel? No!
I'm gonna let it shine
Hide it under a bushel? No!
I'm gonna let it shine
Hide it under a bushel? No!
I'm gonna let it shine
Let it shine,
Let it shine,
Let it shine.

Transitional Youth

Andy and I went downtown last night to a place called Transitional Youth with some friends of ours. You can read Andy's thoughts on it here.
Transitional Youth is a place of safety for kids who live on the streets. Where they can come in, get a good meal, watch a movie, play ping pong or pool, and let their guard down a bit and just be kids for a few hours. Most of them are high school age, some a little older, one kid was still in middle school. As I sat with them, played ping pong, held Stephanie's baby, and watched them carve pumpkins, all my fears vanished. This happens every time I decide to learn from my best friend, Jesus. He is so good to take away all of my insecurities and remind me that I am just like all of these kids. I am not better than them and I really don't have anything to give to them that is from myself. All I have is Jesus. And all He says to do is to LOVE, because He is love and love casts out all fear.

There is no fear in love. But perfect love drives out fear, because fear has to do with punishment. The one who fears is not made perfect in love.

1 John 4:18

It is always intimidating when you decide to enter a culture that you are not a part of. A lot of times we get caught up in the idea that we have to speak their language first or study it first before we dive in. Yes that is great and all, and it does help. But there is something about just doing it and watching the Lord show up to connect you to that culture. He is the Maker of every language, every color, every race, every culture. He has the power to love anyone! So if you decide to take the leap of faith to Love people, God will show up, I have NO doubt. I am NOT perfect, but when I decide to accept that I am weak, His power, His love becomes perfect through me.

My grace is sufficient for you, for power is perfected in weakness.
2 Cor. 12:9

I experienced Jesus last night, I do every time we enter this foreign culture of homelessness/street living. I met Stephanie and her baby, Ricki, Kelly, Carl, Alan, Robert, and a bunch of others. I had some interesting conversations, to say the least, but they were real conversations. Robert, I like to think of him as today's John the Baptist, is the cookiest, craziest, sweetest guy I've ever met. He is completely sold out for God. Everyone loves him and he is ready to just talk to anyone. (I wish he could come to our prayer meetings, his presence alone could bring movement towards Jesus! I only hope I can become so close to my Father that my presence just oozes with His Love.) Once again, the poor ministered to me and peeled off another layer.
The majority of the folks who come to TY just come for the pure fact that it is safe and they can get their bellies full. Some of them come for more and are searching for hope. But it doesn't really matter why they come, it just matters that we "Go". God will do the rest. God will use His willing vessels even if we are weak; all the better.

going downtown

hey folks,
just wanted to ask for prayer as we head downtown Portland tomorrow to hand out care bags and love on the homeless! We successfully reached our goal of 100 bags of toiletries, energy bars, socks, McD's coupons, and other little snack items. Many people contributed to this effort! Yay, God!
We've got a great group going with us....
I pray that each of us is overwhelmed by His heart and passion for each person we meet and talk with.
I pray that we would sense His love and presence so fully that all our fears would dissolve as we enter the darkness that consumes the streets.
I pray that this would be yet another opportunity to knock us all down a notch so that we can truly see that we are ALL children of God.
And most of all I pray that we would all come back shining His light a little bit brighter.
I'll keep you posted!